I’m gamer, so I like to have goals. I like special missions secret objectives. So here’s my special mission for this talk: I’m going try to increase the life span of every single in this room by seven and a half minutes. Literally, you will seven and a half minutes longer than you would have otherwise, just because watched this talk.
Some of you are looking a bit skeptical. That’s okay, because check it out — I have math to prove that it possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain all later, just pay attention to the number at the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That will be my to you if I’m successful in my mission.
Now, you have a secret too. Your mission is to figure out how you want to your extra seven and a half minutes. And I you should do something unusual with them, because these are bonus minutes. weren’t going to have them anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you might be thinking to yourself, know what she wants us to do with those minutes, wants us to spend them playing games. Now this is totally reasonable assumption, given that I have made quite a habit of encouraging people to spend more playing games. For example, in my first TED Talk, I did propose that we spend 21 billion hours a week, as a planet, video games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a lot of time. It’s much time, in fact, that the number one unsolicited comment that I have heard from people all over world since I gave that talk, is this: Jane, games are great and all, on your deathbed, are you really going to wish you spent more time Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea is so pervasive — that are a waste of time that we will come to — that I hear it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: Just a few weeks ago, cab driver, upon finding out that a friend and I were in town for a developers’ conference, turned around and said — and I — “I hate games. Waste of life. Imagine getting to the end of life and regretting all that time.”
Now, I want to take this seriously. I want games to be a force for good in the world. don’t want gamers to regret the time they spent playing, time I encouraged them to spend. So I have been thinking about this question a lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, will we regret the time we spent playing games?
Now, this surprise you, but it turns out there is actually some scientific research this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people who take care of at the end of our lives, recently issued a report on the most expressed regrets that people say when they are literally on their deathbeds. And that’s what I want share with you today — the top five regrets of dying.
Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. two: I wish I had stayed in touch with friends. Number three: I wish I had let myself be happier. Number four: wish I’d had the courage to express my true self. And number five: I wish I’d a life true to my dreams, instead of what expected of me.
Now, as far as I know, one ever told one of the hospice workers, “I wish I’d spent more playing video games,” but when I hear these top regrets of the dying, I can’t help but hear five deep human cravings that games actually help fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. many people, this means, I wish I’d spent more time with my family, with kids when they were growing up. Well, we know that playing together has tremendous family benefits. A recent study from Brigham University School of Family Life reported that parents who spend more time playing video games with kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I I’d stayed in touch with my friends.” Hundreds of of people use social games like FarmVille or Words Friends to stay in daily contact with real-life friends family. A recent study from the University of Michigan showed these games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. They help stay connected with people in our social network that we otherwise grow distant from, if we weren’t playing games together.
“I wish I’d let myself be happier.” Well, here can’t help but think of the groundbreaking clinical trials recently conducted East Carolina University that showed that online games can pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety and depression. Just 30 minutes of online game play day was enough to create dramatic boosts in mood and long-term in happiness.
“I wish I’d had the courage to express my self.” Well, avatars are a way to express our selves, our most heroic, idealized version of who we might become. You can see that this alter ego portrait by Robbie Cooper of a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford has been doing research for five years now to document how playing a game with an idealized avatar how we think and act in real life, making us more courageous, more ambitious, more committed to goals.
“I wish I’d led a life true to my dreams, not what others expected of me.” Are games doing yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left a Super Mario question mark. We’re going to come back this one.
But in the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, is this game designer to be talking to us deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve never worked in a hospice, I’ve never been on deathbed. But recently I did spend three months in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting die.
Now let me tell you that story. It started two years ago, when hit my head and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t properly, and after 30 days, I was left with like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My told me that in order to heal my brain, I had rest it. So I had to avoid everything that triggered my symptoms. For me that meant reading, no writing, no video games, no work or email, no running, no alcohol, no caffeine. other words — and I think you see where this is going — no reason live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant to be funny, but in seriousness, suicidal ideation is quite common with traumatic brain injuries. It happens to one in three, and it to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, you want to die.” It said, “You’re never going to better.” It said, “The pain will never end.”
And voices became so persistent and so persuasive that I to legitimately fear for my life, which is the time that I said to myself after 34 — and I will never forget this moment — I said, “I am going to kill myself or I’m going to turn this into a game.”
Now, why a game? I from researching the psychology of games for more than a that when we play a game — and this in the scientific literature — we tackle tough challenges with more creativity, more determination, more optimism, we’re more likely to reach out to others for help. wanted to bring these gamer traits to my real-life challenge, so I created role-playing recovery game called Jane the Concussion Slayer.
Now this my new secret identity, and the first thing I did as a slayer was my twin sister — I have an identical twin named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a game to heal my brain, I want you to play with me.” This was easier way to ask for help.
She became my first ally the game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together identified and battled the bad guys. Now this was that could trigger my symptoms and therefore slow down the process, things like bright lights and crowded spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. This anything I could do on even my worst day feel just a little bit good, just a little bit productive. Things cuddling my dog for 10 minutes, or getting out of bed walking around the block just once.
Now the game that simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit your allies, battle the guys, activate the power-ups. But even with a game so simple, within just a couple of starting to play, that fog of depression and anxiety away. It just vanished. It felt like a miracle. it wasn’t a miracle cure for the headaches or cognitive symptoms. That lasted for more than a year, and it was the hardest of my life by far. But even when I still had the symptoms, even while I was in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what happened next with the game surprised me. I put up some posts and videos online, explaining how to play. But everybody has a concussion, obviously, not everyone wants to “the slayer,” so I renamed the game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing from people all the world who were adopting their own secret identity, recruiting their own allies, and they getting “super better,” facing challenges like cancer and chronic pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. people were playing it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. And I could tell from their and their videos that the game was helping them in the ways that it helped me. They talked about feeling stronger and braver. talked about feeling better understood by their friends and family. And they talked about feeling happier, even though they were in pain, even though they were tackling toughest challenge of their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is going on here? mean, how could a game so trivial intervene so powerfully in such serious, and some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t for me, there’s no way I would have believed was possible. Well, it turns out there’s some science here, too. Some people stronger and happier after a traumatic event. And that’s was happening to us.
The game was helping us experience what call post-traumatic growth, which is not something we usually hear about. We usually hear about post-traumatic disorder. But scientists now know that a traumatic event doesn’t doom us suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as a springboard to unleash our best qualities lead happier lives.
Here are the top five things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My have changed.” “I’m not afraid to do what makes me happy.” “I feel to my friends and family.” “I understand myself better. I who I really am now.” “I have a new sense of meaning purpose in my life.” “I’m better able to focus my goals and dreams.”
Now, does this sound familiar? should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic growth are essentially the opposite of the top five regrets of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It seems somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability to lead a life with fewer regrets.
But how it work? How do you get from trauma to growth? better yet, is there a way to get all the benefits post-traumatic growth without the trauma, without having to hit your in the first place? That would be good, right?
I wanted understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured the scientific literature, here’s what I learned. There are four kinds of strength, or resilience, that to post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically validated activities that can do every day to build up these four of resilience, and you don’t need a trauma to it.
I could tell you what these four types of strength are, but I’d rather you experience firsthand. I’d rather we all start building them up together right now. Here’s we’re going to do. We’ll play a quick game together. This is you earn the seven and a half minutes of bonus life that I promised earlier. All you have to do is successfully complete first four SuperBetter quests. And I feel like you do it. I have confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? is your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand and take three steps, or make your hands into fists, raise them over your head as high as can for five seconds, go! All right, I like the people both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 physical resilience, which means your body can withstand more stress and heal itself faster. We know from the research that number one thing you can do to boost your resilience is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every single second that you not sitting still, you are actively improving the health of your heart, and lungs and brains.
Everybody ready for your next quest? I want you to your fingers exactly 50 times, or count backwards from 100 by seven, this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t give up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting from 100 interfere with your counting to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s first time I’ve ever seen that. Bonus physical resilience. done, everyone. Now that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means you have more focus, more discipline, determination and willpower. We know from scientific research that willpower actually works like a muscle. gets stronger the more you exercise it. So tackling a tiny challenge without up, even one as absurd as snapping your fingers exactly 50 times or backwards from 100 by seven is actually a scientifically validated way to boost willpower.
So good job. Quest number three. Pick one: Because of room, fate’s really determined this for you, but here are two options. If you’re inside, find a window and look out of it. you’re outside, find a window and look in. Or a quick YouTube or Google image search for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do on your phones, or just shout out some baby animals, and I’ll them on the screen. So, what do we want see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see what got. Baby dolphin and baby llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re clapping for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re feeling there is plus-one emotional resilience, which means you the ability to provoke powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, we feel looking at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s a secret from the literature for you. If you can manage to experience positive emotions for every one negative emotion over the course of hour, a day, a week, you dramatically improve your health and ability to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is the three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, so it up.
All right, pick one, last quest: Shake someone’s for six seconds, or send someone a quick thank you by text, email, or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. Keep it up. love it! All right, everybody, that is +1 social resilience, which means you actually get more from your friends, your neighbors, your family, your community. Now, a great way to boost social is gratitude. Touch is even better.
Here’s one more secret you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises level of oxytocin in your bloodstream, now that’s the trust hormone. means that all of you who just shook hands are primed to like and want to help each other. This linger during the break, so take advantage of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully completed your quests, let’s see if I’ve successfully completed my mission to give you and a half minutes of bonus life. Now I get to share one little bit of science with you. It turns out that people who regularly boost four types of resilience — physical, mental, emotional and — live 10 years longer than everyone else. So this is true. If you are achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if you are sitting still for more than an hour at a time, if you are reaching out one person you care about every single day, if you are tackling tiny goals to boost willpower, you will live 10 years longer than everyone else, here’s where that math I showed you earlier comes in.
So, average life expectancy in the U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, but we know from more 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you can add 10 years of life by your four types of resilience. So every single year that you are boosting your four of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more years of life or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 minutes of life, which means every single day, you are earning 184 minutes life, or every single hour that you are boosting your four types of resilience, like just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half minutes are yours. You totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You have your special mission, your secret mission. How are going to spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s my suggestion. These seven a half bonus minutes are kind of like genie’s wishes. You can use first wish to wish for a million more wishes. clever, right? So, if you spend these seven and half minutes today doing something that makes you happy, or gets you physically active, or puts you in touch with someone you care about, or even tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going to boost your resilience, so you’re going earn more minutes.
And the good news is, you can going like that. Every hour of the day, every day of your life, all the way your deathbed, which will now be 10 years later it would have otherwise. And when you get there, more than likely, you not have any of those top five regrets, because will have built up the strength and resilience to lead life truer to your dreams. And with 10 extra years, might even have enough time to play a few games.
Thank you.
(Applause)