I’m a gamer, so I like to have goals. I special missions and secret objectives. So here’s my special mission for this talk: I’m to try to increase the life span of every single person in this room by seven a half minutes. Literally, you will live seven and half minutes longer than you would have otherwise, just because you watched this talk.
Some of you looking a little bit skeptical. That’s okay, because check it out — have math to prove that it is possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll it all later, just pay attention to the number the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That will be my gift to you if I’m successful in mission.
Now, you have a secret mission too. Your is to figure out how you want to spend your extra seven a half minutes. And I think you should do something unusual them, because these are bonus minutes. You weren’t going have them anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you might be to yourself, I know what she wants us to do with those minutes, she wants to spend them playing games. Now this is a totally assumption, given that I have made quite a habit of encouraging people spend more time playing games. For example, in my first Talk, I did propose that we should spend 21 hours a week, as a planet, playing video games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a lot time. It’s so much time, in fact, that the number one comment that I have heard from people all over the world since I that talk, is this: Jane, games are great and all, on your deathbed, are you really going to wish you more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea is so pervasive — that games are a waste time that we will come to regret — that I hear it literally I go. For example, true story: Just a few ago, this cab driver, upon finding out that a friend and were in town for a game developers’ conference, turned around and — and I quote — “I hate games. Waste life. Imagine getting to the end of your life and regretting all that time.”
Now, I want to this problem seriously. I want games to be a for good in the world. I don’t want gamers regret the time they spent playing, time that I encouraged them to spend. So I have been about this question a lot lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, we regret the time we spent playing games?
Now, this surprise you, but it turns out there is actually scientific research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the who take care of us at the end of our lives, issued a report on the most frequently expressed regrets that say when they are literally on their deathbeds. And that’s what I want to share with you today — top five regrets of the dying.
Number one: I I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I wish had stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: I I had let myself be happier. Number four: I I’d had the courage to express my true self. And number five: I wish I’d lived a life to my dreams, instead of what others expected of me.
Now, as far as I know, no one ever told of the hospice workers, “I wish I’d spent more time playing video games,” but when I hear these five regrets of the dying, I can’t help but hear five deep human cravings games actually help us fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. For people, this means, I wish I’d spent more time with my family, with my kids when they were up. Well, we know that playing games together has tremendous family benefits. A recent study Brigham Young University School of Family Life reported that who spend more time playing video games with their have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d in touch with my friends.” Hundreds of millions of people use social games like FarmVille or With Friends to stay in daily contact with real-life friends and family. A study from the University of Michigan showed that these games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. They help us connected with people in our social network that we would grow distant from, if we weren’t playing games together.
“I I’d let myself be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but think of the groundbreaking trials recently conducted at East Carolina University that showed that online can outperform pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety and depression. Just 30 minutes online game play a day was enough to create boosts in mood and long-term increases in happiness.
“I wish I’d had courage to express my true self.” Well, avatars are a way to express our true selves, most heroic, idealized version of who we might become. can see that in this alter ego portrait by Robbie Cooper of a with his avatar. And Stanford University has been doing research for five years to document how playing a game with an idealized avatar changes how we think and in real life, making us more courageous, more ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I wish I’d a life true to my dreams, and not what others expected of me.” Are games doing yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left a Super question mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, who is this game designer to talking to us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve worked in a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I did spend three in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting to die.
Now let me tell that story. It started two years ago, when I my head and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t properly, and after 30 days, I was left with like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My doctor told me that in to heal my brain, I had to rest it. I had to avoid everything that triggered my symptoms. For me that meant no reading, writing, no video games, no work or email, no running, no alcohol, caffeine. In other words — and I think you where this is going — no reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of it’s meant to be funny, but in all seriousness, ideation is quite common with traumatic brain injuries. It happens to one in three, it happened to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, you want to die.” It said, “You’re going to get better.” It said, “The pain will never end.”
And these became so persistent and so persuasive that I started to fear for my life, which is the time that I said myself after 34 days — and I will never forget this moment — I said, “I am either to kill myself or I’m going to turn this a game.”
Now, why a game? I knew from researching psychology of games for more than a decade that when we play game — and this is in the scientific literature — we tackle tough challenges with creativity, more determination, more optimism, and we’re more likely to reach to others for help. I wanted to bring these gamer traits to my real-life challenge, so I created role-playing recovery game called Jane the Concussion Slayer.
Now this became my secret identity, and the first thing I did as a slayer call my twin sister — I have an identical twin sister named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m a game to heal my brain, and I want you to play me.” This was an easier way to ask for help.
She my first ally in the game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and we identified and battled the bad guys. Now this anything that could trigger my symptoms and therefore slow the healing process, things like bright lights and crowded spaces. We also collected and power-ups. This was anything I could do on even my worst day to feel just a bit good, just a little bit productive. Things like my dog for 10 minutes, or getting out of bed and walking around block just once.
Now the game was that simple: Adopt a secret identity, your allies, battle the bad guys, activate the power-ups. But even with a so simple, within just a couple days of starting play, that fog of depression and anxiety went away. just vanished. It felt like a miracle. Now it wasn’t a miracle cure for the headaches or the symptoms. That lasted for more than a year, and it was hardest year of my life by far. But even when I still the symptoms, even while I was still in pain, stopped suffering.
Now what happened next with the game me. I put up some blog posts and videos online, how to play. But not everybody has a concussion, obviously, everyone wants to be “the slayer,” so I renamed the SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing from people all the world who were adopting their own secret identity, their own allies, and they were getting “super better,” facing like cancer and chronic pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. people were playing it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. I could tell from their messages and their videos that the game was helping in the same ways that it helped me. They talked feeling stronger and braver. They talked about feeling better understood by their friends and family. they even talked about feeling happier, even though they were pain, even though they were tackling the toughest challenge their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is on here? I mean, how could a game so trivial intervene so powerfully such serious, and in some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, it hadn’t worked for me, there’s no way I would have it was possible. Well, it turns out there’s some here, too. Some people get stronger and happier after a traumatic event. And that’s what was to us.
The game was helping us experience what scientists post-traumatic growth, which is not something we usually hear about. We usually hear post-traumatic stress disorder. But scientists now know that a traumatic event doesn’t us to suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as a springboard to unleash our best qualities and happier lives.
Here are the top five things that people post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m not afraid to do what makes happy.” “I feel closer to my friends and family.” “I understand myself better. I who I really am now.” “I have a new of meaning and purpose in my life.” “I’m better to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does this sound familiar? It should, the top five traits of post-traumatic growth are essentially the direct opposite the top five regrets of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It seems that somehow, a event can unlock our ability to lead a life with fewer regrets.
But does it work? How do you get from trauma to growth? better yet, is there a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic growth without the trauma, having to hit your head in the first place? That would be good, right?
I to understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured the scientific literature, and here’s I learned. There are four kinds of strength, or resilience, that contribute post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically validated activities that you can every day to build up these four kinds of resilience, and don’t need a trauma to do it.
I could tell you what these four types of strength are, I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather we all start building them together right now. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll play a quick game together. This is where earn the seven and a half minutes of bonus that I promised you earlier. All you have to do is complete the first four SuperBetter quests. And I feel like you can it. I have confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? is your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand up and three steps, or make your hands into fists, raise them over your head as as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I the people doing both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. is worth +1 physical resilience, which means that your can withstand more stress and heal itself faster. We know from the that the number one thing you can do to boost your physical is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every second that you are not sitting still, you are actively improving health of your heart, and your lungs and brains.
Everybody for your next quest? I want you to snap your fingers exactly 50 times, or backwards from 100 by seven, like this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting down from 100 interfere with your to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the first I’ve ever seen that. Bonus physical resilience. Well done, everyone. that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means you have more mental focus, more discipline, and willpower. We know from the scientific research that willpower actually like a muscle. It gets stronger the more you exercise it. So a tiny challenge without giving up, even one as as snapping your fingers exactly 50 times or counting backwards from 100 by seven actually a scientifically validated way to boost your willpower.
So good job. Quest number three. Pick one: Because of room, fate’s really determined this for you, but here the two options. If you’re inside, find a window look out of it. If you’re outside, find a window and look in. Or do a YouTube or Google image search for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do it on your phones, or shout out some baby animals, and I’ll put them on the screen. So, what do we to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see what we got. Baby dolphin baby llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, one more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re just feeling there is plus-one emotional resilience, which you have the ability to provoke powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, we feel looking at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s a secret from the scientific for you. If you can manage to experience three positive emotions for one negative emotion over the course of an hour, day, a week, you dramatically improve your health and your ability successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is called three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, keep it up.
All right, pick one, last quest: someone’s hand for six seconds, or send someone a quick you by text, email, Facebook or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. it up. I love it! All right, everybody, that is +1 social resilience, which means you actually get strength from your friends, your neighbors, your family, your community. Now, a great way to boost social resilience is gratitude. is even better.
Here’s one more secret for you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically the level of oxytocin in your bloodstream, now that’s the trust hormone. That means all of you who just shook hands are biochemically primed to like and want to help other. This will linger during the break, so take advantage of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have completed your four quests, let’s see if I’ve successfully completed my mission to you seven and a half minutes of bonus life. Now I get share one more little bit of science with you. turns out that people who regularly boost these four of resilience — physical, mental, emotional and social — live 10 longer than everyone else. So this is true. If are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if you are never sitting still more than an hour at a time, if you reaching out to one person you care about every single day, if are tackling tiny goals to boost your willpower, you will 10 years longer than everyone else, and here’s where that I showed you earlier comes in.
So, the average life expectancy the U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, but we know from more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific that you can add 10 years of life by boosting your types of resilience. So every single year that you are your four types of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more of life or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 minutes of life, which means every single day, you are earning 184 of life, or every single hour that you are boosting your four types of resilience, like we just together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes of life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half minutes all yours. You totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You still have special mission, your secret mission. How are you going spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s my suggestion. These and a half bonus minutes are kind of like genie’s wishes. can use your first wish to wish for a more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend these and a half minutes today doing something that makes you happy, or gets you physically active, or puts you in touch someone you care about, or even just tackling a challenge, you’re going to boost your resilience, so you’re going to earn minutes.
And the good news is, you can keep going that. Every hour of the day, every day of your life, all the way to your deathbed, will now be 10 years later than it would have otherwise. when you get there, more than likely, you will not any of those top five regrets, because you will built up the strength and resilience to lead a truer to your dreams. And with 10 extra years, you might even have enough time to play a more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)