I’m a gamer, so like to have goals. I like special missions and secret objectives. here’s my special mission for this talk: I’m going to try to increase the span of every single person in this room by seven and half minutes. Literally, you will live seven and a half longer than you would have otherwise, just because you watched talk.
Some of you are looking a little bit skeptical. That’s okay, check it out — I have math to prove that it is possible. won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain it all later, just pay attention to the number the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That will be my gift you if I’m successful in my mission.
Now, you a secret mission too. Your mission is to figure how you want to spend your extra seven and half minutes. And I think you should do something unusual with them, because are bonus minutes. You weren’t going to have them anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you be thinking to yourself, I know what she wants us to do with those minutes, she wants us spend them playing games. Now this is a totally reasonable assumption, given that have made quite a habit of encouraging people to spend more time playing games. example, in my first TED Talk, I did propose that should spend 21 billion hours a week, as a planet, playing video games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a of time. It’s so much time, in fact, that the one unsolicited comment that I have heard from people all over the world since I that talk, is this: Jane, games are great and all, but on your deathbed, are you really going wish you spent more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea is so pervasive — that games are waste of time that we will come to regret — that I it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: Just a few weeks ago, this driver, upon finding out that a friend and I were in town for game developers’ conference, turned around and said — and I quote — “I hate games. Waste of life. getting to the end of your life and regretting all time.”
Now, I want to take this problem seriously. I want games to be force for good in the world. I don’t want gamers to the time they spent playing, time that I encouraged to spend. So I have been thinking about this question a lot lately. When we’re on deathbeds, will we regret the time we spent playing games?
Now, this surprise you, but it turns out there is actually some research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people take care of us at the end of our lives, issued a report on the most frequently expressed regrets people say when they are literally on their deathbeds. And that’s I want to share with you today — the top five regrets of dying.
Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I wish I stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: I wish I let myself be happier. Number four: I wish I’d had the to express my true self. And number five: I I’d lived a life true to my dreams, instead of others expected of me.
Now, as far as I know, no ever told one of the hospice workers, “I wish I’d more time playing video games,” but when I hear top five regrets of the dying, I can’t help but five deep human cravings that games actually help us fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t so hard. For many people, this means, I wish I’d more time with my family, with my kids when they growing up. Well, we know that playing games together has tremendous family benefits. A recent study from Brigham University School of Family Life reported that parents who spend more time playing video games with kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I I’d stayed in touch with my friends.” Hundreds of millions of use social games like FarmVille or Words With Friends to stay in daily with real-life friends and family. A recent study from the University of showed that these games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. They help us stay with people in our social network that we would otherwise grow distant from, if we weren’t playing together.
“I wish I’d let myself be happier.” Well, here I can’t help think of the groundbreaking clinical trials recently conducted at East Carolina University showed that online games can outperform pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety depression. Just 30 minutes of online game play a day was enough create dramatic boosts in mood and long-term increases in happiness.
“I wish I’d had the courage to express true self.” Well, avatars are a way to express true selves, our most heroic, idealized version of who we might become. You can see that in alter ego portrait by Robbie Cooper of a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford University has doing research for five years now to document how playing game with an idealized avatar changes how we think and act in real life, making more courageous, more ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I I’d led a life true to my dreams, and not what others expected me.” Are games doing this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left Super Mario question mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But in the meantime, you’re wondering, who is this game designer to be talking us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve never worked a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I did spend three months bed, wanting to die. Really wanting to die.
Now let me you that story. It started two years ago, when I hit my head and a concussion. The concussion didn’t heal properly, and after 30 days, was left with symptoms like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My doctor me that in order to heal my brain, I to rest it. So I had to avoid everything that triggered symptoms. For me that meant no reading, no writing, video games, no work or email, no running, no alcohol, no caffeine. In other — and I think you see where this is — no reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant to be funny, but in all seriousness, suicidal is quite common with traumatic brain injuries. It happens one in three, and it happened to me. My brain started me, “Jane, you want to die.” It said, “You’re never going to get better.” said, “The pain will never end.”
And these voices became so persistent and so persuasive that I to legitimately fear for my life, which is the time that I said to myself 34 days — and I will never forget this moment — I said, “I am going to kill myself or I’m going to turn into a game.”
Now, why a game? I knew from researching psychology of games for more than a decade that we play a game — and this is in the scientific — we tackle tough challenges with more creativity, more determination, more optimism, and we’re more likely to reach to others for help. I wanted to bring these gamer traits to my real-life challenge, so I created role-playing recovery game called Jane the Concussion Slayer.
Now this my new secret identity, and the first thing I did as slayer was call my twin sister — I have an identical twin named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a game to heal brain, and I want you to play with me.” This was an easier to ask for help.
She became my first ally the game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together we identified and battled the bad guys. Now this anything that could trigger my symptoms and therefore slow down the healing process, things bright lights and crowded spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. This was anything could do on even my worst day to feel just a little bit good, just a little productive. Things like cuddling my dog for 10 minutes, or getting out bed and walking around the block just once.
Now game was that simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit your allies, battle the guys, activate the power-ups. But even with a game so simple, within a couple days of starting to play, that fog depression and anxiety went away. It just vanished. It felt like a miracle. Now wasn’t a miracle cure for the headaches or the cognitive symptoms. lasted for more than a year, and it was the hardest of my life by far. But even when I had the symptoms, even while I was still in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what next with the game surprised me. I put up some blog posts and videos online, explaining to play. But not everybody has a concussion, obviously, not wants to be “the slayer,” so I renamed the game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing people all over the world who were adopting their secret identity, recruiting their own allies, and they were “super better,” facing challenges like cancer and chronic pain, and Crohn’s disease. Even people were playing it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. I could tell from their messages and their videos the game was helping them in the same ways that it helped me. They talked about stronger and braver. They talked about feeling better understood by their friends and family. they even talked about feeling happier, even though they were pain, even though they were tackling the toughest challenge their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is going on here? I mean, how a game so trivial intervene so powerfully in such serious, in some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t worked for me, there’s no way I would have it was possible. Well, it turns out there’s some here, too. Some people get stronger and happier after a traumatic event. And that’s what was happening us.
The game was helping us experience what scientists post-traumatic growth, which is not something we usually hear about. We usually hear post-traumatic stress disorder. But scientists now know that a traumatic event doesn’t doom to suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as a springboard unleash our best qualities and lead happier lives.
Here are the five things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m not afraid do what makes me happy.” “I feel closer to my friends family.” “I understand myself better. I know who I really am now.” “I have new sense of meaning and purpose in my life.” “I’m better to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does this sound familiar? should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic growth are essentially the direct of the top five regrets of the dying. Now is interesting, right? It seems that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our to lead a life with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? How do get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, is a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic without the trauma, without having to hit your head in first place? That would be good, right?
I wanted to understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured scientific literature, and here’s what I learned. There are four of strength, or resilience, that contribute to post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically validated activities that can do every day to build up these four of resilience, and you don’t need a trauma to it.
I could tell you what these four types of strength are, I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather we all building them up together right now. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll a quick game together. This is where you earn the seven and a half minutes of bonus life I promised you earlier. All you have to do is successfully complete the first four SuperBetter quests. And feel like you can do it. I have confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? This your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand up and take steps, or make your hands into fists, raise them over your head high as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I the people doing both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 resilience, which means that your body can withstand more stress and heal itself faster. We know from the that the number one thing you can do to boost physical resilience is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every single that you are not sitting still, you are actively improving health of your heart, and your lungs and brains.
Everybody ready your next quest? I want you to snap your fingers exactly 50 times, or backwards from 100 by seven, like this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting down from 100 interfere with counting to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the first time I’ve ever seen that. Bonus resilience. Well done, everyone. Now that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means you have more mental focus, discipline, determination and willpower. We know from the scientific research that willpower actually works a muscle. It gets stronger the more you exercise it. So tackling tiny challenge without giving up, even one as absurd as snapping your exactly 50 times or counting backwards from 100 by seven actually a scientifically validated way to boost your willpower.
So good job. Quest three. Pick one: Because of the room, fate’s really determined this for you, but here are two options. If you’re inside, find a window and look of it. If you’re outside, find a window and look in. Or do a quick YouTube or Google search for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do it on your phones, or just out some baby animals, and I’ll put them on the screen. So, do we want to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s what we got. Baby dolphin and baby llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re clapping for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re just feeling there is plus-one resilience, which means you have the ability to provoke powerful, positive emotions curiosity or love, which we feel looking at baby animals, you need them most.
Here’s a secret from the literature for you. If you can manage to experience three positive emotions every one negative emotion over the course of an hour, day, a week, you dramatically improve your health and your to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is the three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, so keep it up.
All right, one, last quest: Shake someone’s hand for six seconds, or someone a quick thank you by text, email, Facebook Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. it up. I love it! All right, everybody, that is +1 resilience, which means you actually get more strength from your friends, your neighbors, your family, your community. Now, great way to boost social resilience is gratitude. Touch even better.
Here’s one more secret for you: Shaking someone’s hand six seconds dramatically raises the level of oxytocin in bloodstream, now that’s the trust hormone. That means that of you who just shook hands are biochemically primed to and want to help each other. This will linger during the break, so take of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully your four quests, let’s see if I’ve successfully completed mission to give you seven and a half minutes of bonus life. Now I get share one more little bit of science with you. It turns out that people regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, and social — live 10 years longer than everyone else. So is true. If you are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, you are never sitting still for more than an hour a time, if you are reaching out to one person you about every single day, if you are tackling tiny to boost your willpower, you will live 10 years longer everyone else, and here’s where that math I showed you earlier comes in.
So, average life expectancy in the U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, but we from more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you add 10 years of life by boosting your four types of resilience. So every year that you are boosting your four types of resilience, you’re actually .128 more years of life or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 minutes of life, which means every single day, you are earning 184 of life, or every single hour that you are boosting your four types resilience, like we just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes of life.
Congratulations, those and a half minutes are all yours. You totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You have your special mission, your secret mission. How are going to spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s suggestion. These seven and a half bonus minutes are of like genie’s wishes. You can use your first wish to wish for a more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend seven and a half minutes today doing something that makes happy, or that gets you physically active, or puts you in touch with you care about, or even just tackling a tiny challenge, you’re to boost your resilience, so you’re going to earn minutes.
And the good news is, you can keep going like that. Every hour the day, every day of your life, all the way to deathbed, which will now be 10 years later than would have otherwise. And when you get there, more likely, you will not have any of those top five regrets, because you will have built the strength and resilience to lead a life truer to your dreams. And with 10 years, you might even have enough time to play a more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)