I’m a gamer, I like to have goals. I like special missions and objectives. So here’s my special mission for this talk: I’m going to to increase the life span of every single person in this by seven and a half minutes. Literally, you will live seven and half minutes longer than you would have otherwise, just because you watched this talk.
Some of are looking a little bit skeptical. That’s okay, because check out — I have math to prove that it possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain it all later, just pay attention to number at the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That will be my gift to if I’m successful in my mission.
Now, you have a secret mission too. Your mission is to out how you want to spend your extra seven and a half minutes. And think you should do something unusual with them, because are bonus minutes. You weren’t going to have them anyway.
Now, because I’m game designer, you might be thinking to yourself, I know what she wants to do with those minutes, she wants us to spend them playing games. Now is a totally reasonable assumption, given that I have quite a habit of encouraging people to spend more playing games. For example, in my first TED Talk, I did propose that we should spend 21 billion a week, as a planet, playing video games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s lot of time. It’s so much time, in fact, that the number one unsolicited that I have heard from people all over the world I gave that talk, is this: Jane, games are and all, but on your deathbed, are you really going to you spent more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This is so pervasive — that games are a waste time that we will come to regret — that I it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: Just few weeks ago, this cab driver, upon finding out that friend and I were in town for a game developers’ conference, around and said — and I quote — “I hate games. Waste life. Imagine getting to the end of your life and all that time.”
Now, I want to take this problem seriously. I games to be a force for good in the world. I don’t gamers to regret the time they spent playing, time that I them to spend. So I have been thinking about question a lot lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, we regret the time we spent playing games?
Now, may surprise you, but it turns out there is some scientific research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people who take care of at the end of our lives, recently issued a report on most frequently expressed regrets that people say when they literally on their deathbeds. And that’s what I want to share with you today — top five regrets of the dying.
Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I I had stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: I wish I had let be happier. Number four: I wish I’d had the to express my true self. And number five: I wish I’d a life true to my dreams, instead of what others of me.
Now, as far as I know, no one ever told of the hospice workers, “I wish I’d spent more time playing video games,” when I hear these top five regrets of the dying, can’t help but hear five deep human cravings that actually help us fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t so hard. For many people, this means, I wish I’d spent time with my family, with my kids when they growing up. Well, we know that playing games together has tremendous benefits. A recent study from Brigham Young University School of Family Life that parents who spend more time playing video games with kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d in touch with my friends.” Hundreds of millions of people social games like FarmVille or Words With Friends to stay in daily contact real-life friends and family. A recent study from the University of showed that these games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. They help us stay connected with people our social network that we would otherwise grow distant from, if we weren’t playing together.
“I wish I’d let myself be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but think of the groundbreaking trials recently conducted at East Carolina University that showed that online can outperform pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety and depression. Just 30 minutes of online game play a was enough to create dramatic boosts in mood and long-term increases happiness.
“I wish I’d had the courage to express my true self.” Well, avatars are way to express our true selves, our most heroic, idealized version of we might become. You can see that in this ego portrait by Robbie Cooper of a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford has been doing research for five years now to document how a game with an idealized avatar changes how we think and act in real life, making more courageous, more ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I I’d led a life true to my dreams, and not others expected of me.” Are games doing this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left Super Mario question mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, who is this game designer to be talking us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve never in a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I did three months in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting die.
Now let me tell you that story. It started two ago, when I hit my head and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t heal properly, after 30 days, I was left with symptoms like headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My doctor told me that in to heal my brain, I had to rest it. So I had to avoid everything that my symptoms. For me that meant no reading, no writing, no video games, no work email, no running, no alcohol, no caffeine. In other — and I think you see where this is — no reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s to be funny, but in all seriousness, suicidal ideation is quite common traumatic brain injuries. It happens to one in three, and it to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, you to die.” It said, “You’re never going to get better.” It said, “The pain will end.”
And these voices became so persistent and so that I started to legitimately fear for my life, which is the time that I said to after 34 days — and I will never forget this moment — I said, “I either going to kill myself or I’m going to turn this into a game.”
Now, why a game? knew from researching the psychology of games for more than a decade that when we play game — and this is in the scientific literature — we tackle tough challenges with more creativity, more determination, optimism, and we’re more likely to reach out to for help. I wanted to bring these gamer traits to real-life challenge, so I created a role-playing recovery game called the Concussion Slayer.
Now this became my new secret identity, and the first thing did as a slayer was call my twin sister — have an identical twin sister named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a to heal my brain, and I want you to play with me.” This an easier way to ask for help.
She became my first ally the game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together we identified and battled the guys. Now this was anything that could trigger my and therefore slow down the healing process, things like bright and crowded spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. This anything I could do on even my worst day to feel just a little good, just a little bit productive. Things like cuddling my for 10 minutes, or getting out of bed and walking around the block just once.
Now the was that simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit your allies, the bad guys, activate the power-ups. But even with a game so simple, within just a couple of starting to play, that fog of depression and anxiety went away. It just vanished. It like a miracle. Now it wasn’t a miracle cure the headaches or the cognitive symptoms. That lasted for more a year, and it was the hardest year of my life far. But even when I still had the symptoms, while I was still in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what happened next with the game surprised me. put up some blog posts and videos online, explaining to play. But not everybody has a concussion, obviously, not everyone wants to be “the slayer,” so renamed the game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing people all over the world who were adopting their own identity, recruiting their own allies, and they were getting “super better,” facing challenges like cancer and pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. Even people were playing it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. And could tell from their messages and their videos that the game was helping them in the same ways it helped me. They talked about feeling stronger and braver. They talked about feeling better understood by friends and family. And they even talked about feeling happier, though they were in pain, even though they were tackling the toughest challenge their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is going on here? I mean, how a game so trivial intervene so powerfully in such serious, and some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t for me, there’s no way I would have believed it was possible. Well, it out there’s some science here, too. Some people get stronger happier after a traumatic event. And that’s what was happening to us.
The game was helping us what scientists call post-traumatic growth, which is not something we usually hear about. We usually about post-traumatic stress disorder. But scientists now know that a event doesn’t doom us to suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as springboard to unleash our best qualities and lead happier lives.
Here are the five things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities changed.” “I’m not afraid to do what makes me happy.” “I closer to my friends and family.” “I understand myself better. know who I really am now.” “I have a new of meaning and purpose in my life.” “I’m better able to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, this sound familiar? It should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic are essentially the direct opposite of the top five of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability lead a life with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? do you get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, is there a way to get the benefits of post-traumatic growth without the trauma, without having to hit your head in the first place? would be good, right?
I wanted to understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured the literature, and here’s what I learned. There are four kinds of strength, resilience, that contribute to post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically validated activities that you do every day to build up these four kinds resilience, and you don’t need a trauma to do it.
I tell you what these four types of strength are, I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather we all building them up together right now. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll play a quick together. This is where you earn the seven and a minutes of bonus life that I promised you earlier. you have to do is successfully complete the first SuperBetter quests. And I feel like you can do it. I have confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? This your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand up and take three steps, or make your hands fists, raise them over your head as high as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I the people doing both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is +1 physical resilience, which means that your body can withstand stress and heal itself faster. We know from the research that number one thing you can do to boost your resilience is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every second that you are not sitting still, you are improving the health of your heart, and your lungs brains.
Everybody ready for your next quest? I want you snap your fingers exactly 50 times, or count backwards 100 by seven, like this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting down from 100 interfere your counting to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the first time I’ve ever that. Bonus physical resilience. Well done, everyone. Now that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means have more mental focus, more discipline, determination and willpower. We know the scientific research that willpower actually works like a muscle. It gets stronger the more exercise it. So tackling a tiny challenge without giving up, even one as absurd as snapping your exactly 50 times or counting backwards from 100 by seven is actually scientifically validated way to boost your willpower.
So good job. number three. Pick one: Because of the room, fate’s really determined this for you, but are the two options. If you’re inside, find a window and look of it. If you’re outside, find a window and look in. Or do a quick YouTube Google image search for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do it on your phones, or just shout out baby animals, and I’ll put them on the screen. So, what do want to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see what we got. dolphin and baby llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, one more. elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re clapping for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re feeling there is plus-one emotional resilience, which means you have the to provoke powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, we feel looking at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s a from the scientific literature for you. If you can manage to experience three positive emotions for one negative emotion over the course of an hour, a day, a week, you dramatically improve your and your ability to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is called the three-to-one positive ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, so keep it up.
All right, one, last quest: Shake someone’s hand for six seconds, or send a quick thank you by text, email, Facebook or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. Keep up. I love it! All right, everybody, that is +1 social resilience, which you actually get more strength from your friends, your neighbors, your family, community. Now, a great way to boost social resilience is gratitude. Touch is better.
Here’s one more secret for you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises level of oxytocin in your bloodstream, now that’s the hormone. That means that all of you who just shook hands biochemically primed to like and want to help each other. This linger during the break, so take advantage of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have completed your four quests, let’s see if I’ve successfully completed my mission give you seven and a half minutes of bonus life. Now I get to share one little bit of science with you. It turns out people who regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, emotional social — live 10 years longer than everyone else. So this is true. you are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if you are never sitting still for than an hour at a time, if you are reaching out one person you care about every single day, if you are tackling tiny to boost your willpower, you will live 10 years longer than else, and here’s where that math I showed you earlier comes in.
So, the average life expectancy in U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, but we know more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you can add 10 years life by boosting your four types of resilience. So every single year that you are your four types of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 years of life or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 more minutes of life, which every single day, you are earning 184 minutes of life, or single hour that you are boosting your four types of resilience, we just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half minutes are all yours. You earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You still have your special mission, your secret mission. How you going to spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s suggestion. These seven and a half bonus minutes are of like genie’s wishes. You can use your first wish to wish for million more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend these and a half minutes today doing something that makes happy, or that gets you physically active, or puts in touch with someone you care about, or even just tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going to your resilience, so you’re going to earn more minutes.
And the good is, you can keep going like that. Every hour of the day, every day your life, all the way to your deathbed, which now be 10 years later than it would have otherwise. And you get there, more than likely, you will not have any of those top five regrets, because will have built up the strength and resilience to lead a life to your dreams. And with 10 extra years, you might even have enough time to a few more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)