I’m gamer, so I like to have goals. I like special missions and secret objectives. So here’s special mission for this talk: I’m going to try to increase the life span of single person in this room by seven and a half minutes. Literally, will live seven and a half minutes longer than would have otherwise, just because you watched this talk.
Some of are looking a little bit skeptical. That’s okay, because it out — I have math to prove that it is possible. won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain it all later, pay attention to the number at the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That will be my gift you if I’m successful in my mission.
Now, you have a secret mission too. mission is to figure out how you want to your extra seven and a half minutes. And I think you do something unusual with them, because these are bonus minutes. You weren’t to have them anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you be thinking to yourself, I know what she wants us do with those minutes, she wants us to spend them playing games. this is a totally reasonable assumption, given that I made quite a habit of encouraging people to spend more time games. For example, in my first TED Talk, I did propose that should spend 21 billion hours a week, as a planet, playing games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a lot of time. It’s so much time, in fact, the number one unsolicited comment that I have heard from all over the world since I gave that talk, this: Jane, games are great and all, but on your deathbed, you really going to wish you spent more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea is pervasive — that games are a waste of time that we come to regret — that I hear it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: a few weeks ago, this cab driver, upon finding out that a friend and I were town for a game developers’ conference, turned around and — and I quote — “I hate games. Waste of life. Imagine getting to the end of your and regretting all that time.”
Now, I want to take this problem seriously. I want games to a force for good in the world. I don’t gamers to regret the time they spent playing, time that I encouraged them to spend. I have been thinking about this question a lot lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, will we regret time we spent playing games?
Now, this may surprise you, but it turns there is actually some scientific research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, people who take care of us at the end of our lives, recently issued a on the most frequently expressed regrets that people say when they are literally on their deathbeds. that’s what I want to share with you today — the top five regrets of dying.
Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I wish I had in touch with my friends. Number three: I wish had let myself be happier. Number four: I wish I’d the courage to express my true self. And number five: I wish I’d lived a life true to dreams, instead of what others expected of me.
Now, far as I know, no one ever told one of the hospice workers, “I wish I’d spent more playing video games,” but when I hear these top five regrets of dying, I can’t help but hear five deep human that games actually help us fulfill.
For example, I I hadn’t worked so hard. For many people, this means, I wish I’d spent time with my family, with my kids when they were growing up. Well, we know that games together has tremendous family benefits. A recent study from Brigham Young School of Family Life reported that parents who spend more time playing video games their kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d stayed in touch with friends.” Hundreds of millions of people use social games like FarmVille or Words With Friends to stay daily contact with real-life friends and family. A recent study from the of Michigan showed that these games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. help us stay connected with people in our social network we would otherwise grow distant from, if we weren’t games together.
“I wish I’d let myself be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but think of the clinical trials recently conducted at East Carolina University that showed that online games can outperform pharmaceuticals treating clinical anxiety and depression. Just 30 minutes of online game play a day was enough create dramatic boosts in mood and long-term increases in happiness.
“I wish I’d the courage to express my true self.” Well, avatars a way to express our true selves, our most heroic, idealized version who we might become. You can see that in this alter ego portrait by Robbie Cooper a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford University has been doing research for five now to document how playing a game with an idealized avatar changes we think and act in real life, making us more courageous, ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I wish I’d led a life true to my dreams, and not others expected of me.” Are games doing this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left a Super question mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But in the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, is this game designer to be talking to us about regrets? And it’s true, I’ve never worked in a hospice, I’ve never been on deathbed. But recently I did spend three months in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting to die.
Now me tell you that story. It started two years ago, I hit my head and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t properly, and after 30 days, I was left with like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My doctor me that in order to heal my brain, I had rest it. So I had to avoid everything that triggered my symptoms. For me meant no reading, no writing, no video games, no work or email, no running, no alcohol, caffeine. In other words — and I think you see where this is going — reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant to funny, but in all seriousness, suicidal ideation is quite with traumatic brain injuries. It happens to one in three, and happened to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, you want die.” It said, “You’re never going to get better.” It said, “The pain never end.”
And these voices became so persistent and persuasive that I started to legitimately fear for my life, which is time that I said to myself after 34 days — and will never forget this moment — I said, “I am either to kill myself or I’m going to turn this a game.”
Now, why a game? I knew from researching the psychology of games more than a decade that when we play a game — and is in the scientific literature — we tackle tough with more creativity, more determination, more optimism, and we’re more likely to reach to others for help. I wanted to bring these gamer to my real-life challenge, so I created a role-playing recovery game called Jane Concussion Slayer.
Now this became my new secret identity, and the first thing did as a slayer was call my twin sister — I have an identical twin named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a game to heal my brain, I want you to play with me.” This was an easier to ask for help.
She became my first ally the game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together identified and battled the bad guys. Now this was that could trigger my symptoms and therefore slow down the healing process, things like bright lights and spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. This was I could do on even my worst day to feel just a little good, just a little bit productive. Things like cuddling dog for 10 minutes, or getting out of bed and walking around the block just once.
Now game was that simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit your allies, the bad guys, activate the power-ups. But even with a game so simple, within just a days of starting to play, that fog of depression and anxiety went away. It just vanished. felt like a miracle. Now it wasn’t a miracle for the headaches or the cognitive symptoms. That lasted for than a year, and it was the hardest year of life by far. But even when I still had symptoms, even while I was still in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what happened with the game surprised me. I put up some blog posts videos online, explaining how to play. But not everybody has a concussion, obviously, everyone wants to be “the slayer,” so I renamed game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing from people all over world who were adopting their own secret identity, recruiting own allies, and they were getting “super better,” facing challenges like cancer and chronic pain, and Crohn’s disease. Even people were playing it for terminal diagnoses ALS. And I could tell from their messages and their videos that the game was helping them the same ways that it helped me. They talked about feeling and braver. They talked about feeling better understood by their friends and family. And even talked about feeling happier, even though they were pain, even though they were tackling the toughest challenge of their lives.
Now the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is going on here? I mean, how could a game trivial intervene so powerfully in such serious, and in some life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t worked for me, there’s no I would have believed it was possible. Well, it out there’s some science here, too. Some people get stronger and happier after a event. And that’s what was happening to us.
The game was helping us experience scientists call post-traumatic growth, which is not something we usually hear about. We usually hear about post-traumatic disorder. But scientists now know that a traumatic event doesn’t doom us to indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as a springboard to our best qualities and lead happier lives.
Here are top five things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m not afraid do what makes me happy.” “I feel closer to my friends and family.” “I understand better. I know who I really am now.” “I have a new of meaning and purpose in my life.” “I’m better to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does sound familiar? It should, because the top five traits post-traumatic growth are essentially the direct opposite of the top regrets of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability lead a life with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? do you get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, there a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic without the trauma, without having to hit your head in the first place? That would good, right?
I wanted to understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured the scientific literature, and here’s I learned. There are four kinds of strength, or resilience, that to post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically validated activities that can do every day to build up these four kinds of resilience, and you don’t a trauma to do it.
I could tell you what these four types of strength are, I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather we all building them up together right now. Here’s what we’re to do. We’ll play a quick game together. This where you earn the seven and a half minutes of bonus life that I promised you earlier. All have to do is successfully complete the first four SuperBetter quests. And feel like you can do it. I have confidence you.
So, everybody ready? This is your first quest. Here go. Pick one: Stand up and take three steps, or your hands into fists, raise them over your head as as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I like the people doing both. You overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 resilience, which means that your body can withstand more stress and heal faster. We know from the research that the number thing you can do to boost your physical resilience is to not still. That’s all it takes. Every single second that you are sitting still, you are actively improving the health of heart, and your lungs and brains.
Everybody ready for next quest? I want you to snap your fingers exactly 50 times, or count from 100 by seven, like this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t give up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting from 100 interfere with your counting to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the time I’ve ever seen that. Bonus physical resilience. Well done, everyone. that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means you have more focus, more discipline, determination and willpower. We know from the scientific that willpower actually works like a muscle. It gets stronger the more you it. So tackling a tiny challenge without giving up, even as absurd as snapping your fingers exactly 50 times counting backwards from 100 by seven is actually a validated way to boost your willpower.
So good job. number three. Pick one: Because of the room, fate’s really this for you, but here are the two options. If you’re inside, a window and look out of it. If you’re outside, find a window and in. Or do a quick YouTube or Google image for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do it on your phones, or shout out some baby animals, and I’ll put them the screen. So, what do we want to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see what we got. Baby dolphin baby llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, one more. elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re clapping for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re just feeling there plus-one emotional resilience, which means you have the ability to powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, which we looking at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s secret from the scientific literature for you. If you can manage experience three positive emotions for every one negative emotion over the course of an hour, day, a week, you dramatically improve your health and your to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is the three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, so keep it up.
All right, pick one, quest: Shake someone’s hand for six seconds, or send someone a quick thank you text, email, Facebook or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. it up. I love it! All right, everybody, that +1 social resilience, which means you actually get more strength from your friends, your neighbors, family, your community. Now, a great way to boost resilience is gratitude. Touch is even better.
Here’s one more secret you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises the level of oxytocin your bloodstream, now that’s the trust hormone. That means that all of you who shook hands are biochemically primed to like and want to help each other. will linger during the break, so take advantage of the opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully completed your four quests, let’s see if I’ve completed my mission to give you seven and a half minutes of bonus life. I get to share one more little bit of science with you. It turns out people who regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, emotional social — live 10 years longer than everyone else. this is true. If you are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if are never sitting still for more than an hour at a time, if you are reaching out one person you care about every single day, if you are tackling goals to boost your willpower, you will live 10 years longer than everyone else, and here’s where that I showed you earlier comes in.
So, the average life expectancy the U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, but know from more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you can add 10 years life by boosting your four types of resilience. So every year that you are boosting your four types of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more years of or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 more of life, which means every single day, you are earning 184 minutes of life, or every single hour you are boosting your four types of resilience, like we just together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes of life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half minutes all yours. You totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You have your special mission, your secret mission. How are you to spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s my suggestion. These seven and a bonus minutes are kind of like genie’s wishes. You can use your wish to wish for a million more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, you spend these seven and a half minutes today doing something makes you happy, or that gets you physically active, or puts you touch with someone you care about, or even just tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going to boost resilience, so you’re going to earn more minutes.
And good news is, you can keep going like that. Every hour of day, every day of your life, all the way to your deathbed, which now be 10 years later than it would have otherwise. when you get there, more than likely, you will not have any of those top five regrets, because will have built up the strength and resilience to a life truer to your dreams. And with 10 years, you might even have enough time to play a more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)