I’m a gamer, so I to have goals. I like special missions and secret objectives. So here’s special mission for this talk: I’m going to try to the life span of every single person in this by seven and a half minutes. Literally, you will live seven and a half minutes longer you would have otherwise, just because you watched this talk.
Some of you are looking a little skeptical. That’s okay, because check it out — I math to prove that it is possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain it later, just pay attention to the number at the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. will be my gift to you if I’m successful in mission.
Now, you have a secret mission too. Your mission to figure out how you want to spend your seven and a half minutes. And I think you should do unusual with them, because these are bonus minutes. You weren’t going to have anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you might be thinking to yourself, know what she wants us to do with those minutes, she wants us to spend them playing games. Now is a totally reasonable assumption, given that I have quite a habit of encouraging people to spend more time playing games. For example, my first TED Talk, I did propose that we should 21 billion hours a week, as a planet, playing games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a lot of time. It’s so much time, in fact, the number one unsolicited comment that I have heard from people all over the world since gave that talk, is this: Jane, games are great and all, but on your deathbed, are you really to wish you spent more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This is so pervasive — that games are a waste time that we will come to regret — that hear it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: Just a weeks ago, this cab driver, upon finding out that a friend and were in town for a game developers’ conference, turned around and said — I quote — “I hate games. Waste of life. Imagine getting to the end of your life regretting all that time.”
Now, I want to take this seriously. I want games to be a force for in the world. I don’t want gamers to regret the time they playing, time that I encouraged them to spend. So I have been about this question a lot lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, will regret the time we spent playing games?
Now, this may surprise you, but it turns out is actually some scientific research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people who take care us at the end of our lives, recently issued a report on the frequently expressed regrets that people say when they are literally their deathbeds. And that’s what I want to share you today — the top five regrets of the dying.
Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: I wish I had let myself happier. Number four: I wish I’d had the courage express my true self. And number five: I wish I’d lived a life to my dreams, instead of what others expected of me.
Now, as as I know, no one ever told one of hospice workers, “I wish I’d spent more time playing video games,” but when I these top five regrets of the dying, I can’t but hear five deep human cravings that games actually us fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. many people, this means, I wish I’d spent more with my family, with my kids when they were growing up. Well, we that playing games together has tremendous family benefits. A recent study from Brigham Young University of Family Life reported that parents who spend more time playing video games with kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d stayed in touch my friends.” Hundreds of millions of people use social like FarmVille or Words With Friends to stay in contact with real-life friends and family. A recent study the University of Michigan showed that these games are incredibly relationship-management tools. They help us stay connected with people in our network that we would otherwise grow distant from, if we weren’t playing games together.
“I wish I’d let be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but think of the groundbreaking clinical trials conducted at East Carolina University that showed that online can outperform pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety and depression. 30 minutes of online game play a day was enough create dramatic boosts in mood and long-term increases in happiness.
“I I’d had the courage to express my true self.” Well, avatars are way to express our true selves, our most heroic, version of who we might become. You can see in this alter ego portrait by Robbie Cooper of a with his avatar. And Stanford University has been doing research for five years now to document playing a game with an idealized avatar changes how we think and act in real life, making more courageous, more ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I wish I’d a life true to my dreams, and not what others expected me.” Are games doing this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve a Super Mario question mark. We’re going to come to this one.
But in the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, who is this game to be talking to us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve worked in a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I spend three months in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting to die.
Now me tell you that story. It started two years ago, when I hit my and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t heal properly, after 30 days, I was left with symptoms like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My told me that in order to heal my brain, had to rest it. So I had to avoid everything that triggered symptoms. For me that meant no reading, no writing, no video games, work or email, no running, no alcohol, no caffeine. In other words — and I think you see this is going — no reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant be funny, but in all seriousness, suicidal ideation is common with traumatic brain injuries. It happens to one in three, it happened to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, want to die.” It said, “You’re never going to better.” It said, “The pain will never end.”
And these voices so persistent and so persuasive that I started to fear for my life, which is the time that I said to myself after 34 — and I will never forget this moment — I said, “I am going to kill myself or I’m going to turn this into game.”
Now, why a game? I knew from researching the psychology of games for more than a decade when we play a game — and this is the scientific literature — we tackle tough challenges with creativity, more determination, more optimism, and we’re more likely reach out to others for help. I wanted to bring these gamer to my real-life challenge, so I created a role-playing recovery called Jane the Concussion Slayer.
Now this became my new identity, and the first thing I did as a slayer was my twin sister — I have an identical twin sister named Kelly — and her, “I’m playing a game to heal my brain, and I want you to with me.” This was an easier way to ask for help.
She became my first ally in game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together we identified and the bad guys. Now this was anything that could my symptoms and therefore slow down the healing process, like bright lights and crowded spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. This anything I could do on even my worst day to feel just a little bit good, a little bit productive. Things like cuddling my dog for 10 minutes, or getting of bed and walking around the block just once.
Now the game that simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit your allies, battle the bad guys, activate the power-ups. even with a game so simple, within just a days of starting to play, that fog of depression anxiety went away. It just vanished. It felt like a miracle. Now it wasn’t a miracle for the headaches or the cognitive symptoms. That lasted for more than a year, it was the hardest year of my life by far. But even I still had the symptoms, even while I was still in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what happened with the game surprised me. I put up some posts and videos online, explaining how to play. But not has a concussion, obviously, not everyone wants to be “the slayer,” I renamed the game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing people all over the world who were adopting their own secret identity, recruiting their own allies, and they getting “super better,” facing challenges like cancer and chronic pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. Even people were playing for terminal diagnoses like ALS. And I could tell from their messages and their videos the game was helping them in the same ways that helped me. They talked about feeling stronger and braver. They talked about better understood by their friends and family. And they even talked about feeling happier, even they were in pain, even though they were tackling the toughest of their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, what going on here? I mean, how could a game so trivial intervene so powerfully in such serious, in some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t worked for me, there’s no way I have believed it was possible. Well, it turns out there’s some science here, too. Some people get stronger happier after a traumatic event. And that’s what was happening to us.
The game was helping us experience scientists call post-traumatic growth, which is not something we hear about. We usually hear about post-traumatic stress disorder. But scientists know that a traumatic event doesn’t doom us to suffer indefinitely. Instead, can use it as a springboard to unleash our best qualities and lead happier lives.
Here the top five things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m not to do what makes me happy.” “I feel closer my friends and family.” “I understand myself better. I know who really am now.” “I have a new sense of meaning and purpose in my life.” “I’m able to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does this familiar? It should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic are essentially the direct opposite of the top five of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability to a life with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? How you get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, there a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic growth without trauma, without having to hit your head in the first place? That be good, right?
I wanted to understand the phenomenon better, so I the scientific literature, and here’s what I learned. There are four kinds of strength, resilience, that contribute to post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically activities that you can do every day to build up these four kinds of resilience, and don’t need a trauma to do it.
I could tell you what these four types of are, but I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather we all start building them up right now. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll play a quick game together. This is where earn the seven and a half minutes of bonus life that I promised you earlier. you have to do is successfully complete the first four SuperBetter quests. I feel like you can do it. I have confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? This your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand up and take three steps, or your hands into fists, raise them over your head high as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I like the people doing both. You are overachievers. good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 resilience, which means that your body can withstand more stress and heal faster. We know from the research that the number one thing you can do to boost your resilience is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every single second that you not sitting still, you are actively improving the health of heart, and your lungs and brains.
Everybody ready for next quest? I want you to snap your fingers 50 times, or count backwards from 100 by seven, this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t give up.
(Snapping)
Don’t the people counting down from 100 interfere with your counting 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the first time I’ve ever seen that. physical resilience. Well done, everyone. Now that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means have more mental focus, more discipline, determination and willpower. We know from the scientific research that actually works like a muscle. It gets stronger the more you it. So tackling a tiny challenge without giving up, even one as as snapping your fingers exactly 50 times or counting backwards 100 by seven is actually a scientifically validated way boost your willpower.
So good job. Quest number three. Pick one: of the room, fate’s really determined this for you, but here are two options. If you’re inside, find a window and out of it. If you’re outside, find a window and look in. do a quick YouTube or Google image search for “baby [your animal.]”
Do it on your phones, or just shout some baby animals, and I’ll put them on the screen. So, do we want to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see we got. Baby dolphin and baby llamas. Everybody look. that? Okay, one more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re just feeling is plus-one emotional resilience, which means you have the ability to powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, which we feel at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s a from the scientific literature for you. If you can to experience three positive emotions for every one negative emotion over course of an hour, a day, a week, you dramatically improve your and your ability to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And is called the three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my SuperBetter trick, so keep it up.
All right, pick one, quest: Shake someone’s hand for six seconds, or send someone a quick thank you by text, email, Facebook Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. Keep it up. I love it! All right, everybody, is +1 social resilience, which means you actually get more strength from your friends, your neighbors, your family, community. Now, a great way to boost social resilience is gratitude. Touch is even better.
Here’s more secret for you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises the level of oxytocin in bloodstream, now that’s the trust hormone. That means that all of you who just hands are biochemically primed to like and want to help each other. This will linger during break, so take advantage of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully completed your quests, let’s see if I’ve successfully completed my mission to give you seven and a half minutes bonus life. Now I get to share one more bit of science with you. It turns out that who regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, emotional and social — live 10 years than everyone else. So this is true. If you are regularly the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if you are never sitting still more than an hour at a time, if you are out to one person you care about every single day, if you are tackling tiny goals to your willpower, you will live 10 years longer than everyone else, here’s where that math I showed you earlier comes in.
So, the average life in the U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, we know from more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you add 10 years of life by boosting your four of resilience. So every single year that you are boosting your four of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more years of life 46 more days of life, or 67,298 more minutes of life, which every single day, you are earning 184 minutes of life, or every hour that you are boosting your four types of resilience, we just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more of life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half minutes are all yours. You earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You still have your special mission, your mission. How are you going to spend these minutes bonus life?
Well, here’s my suggestion. These seven and a half bonus are kind of like genie’s wishes. You can use your first wish to for a million more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend seven and a half minutes today doing something that you happy, or that gets you physically active, or puts in touch with someone you care about, or even tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going to boost your resilience, so you’re going to earn more minutes.
And good news is, you can keep going like that. Every of the day, every day of your life, all the way to your deathbed, which will now 10 years later than it would have otherwise. And you get there, more than likely, you will not have any of those top five regrets, because you have built up the strength and resilience to lead a life truer to your dreams. with 10 extra years, you might even have enough time to play few more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)