I’m a gamer, so I like have goals. I like special missions and secret objectives. here’s my special mission for this talk: I’m going try to increase the life span of every single person this room by seven and a half minutes. Literally, will live seven and a half minutes longer than you have otherwise, just because you watched this talk.
Some of you looking a little bit skeptical. That’s okay, because check it out — I have math to prove that is possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain all later, just pay attention to the number at bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That will be my gift to you if I’m in my mission.
Now, you have a secret mission too. Your mission is to figure out how you want spend your extra seven and a half minutes. And I think should do something unusual with them, because these are bonus minutes. You weren’t going have them anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you might be thinking to yourself, I know what wants us to do with those minutes, she wants us to spend playing games. Now this is a totally reasonable assumption, that I have made quite a habit of encouraging to spend more time playing games. For example, in my first Talk, I did propose that we should spend 21 billion hours a week, as a planet, video games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a lot time. It’s so much time, in fact, that the number one comment that I have heard from people all over the world I gave that talk, is this: Jane, games are great and all, but on your deathbed, are really going to wish you spent more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea is pervasive — that games are a waste of time that we will come to regret — I hear it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: a few weeks ago, this cab driver, upon finding out a friend and I were in town for a game developers’ conference, turned around and — and I quote — “I hate games. Waste of life. Imagine getting the end of your life and regretting all that time.”
Now, I to take this problem seriously. I want games to be force for good in the world. I don’t want to regret the time they spent playing, time that I encouraged to spend. So I have been thinking about this question a lot lately. we’re on our deathbeds, will we regret the time spent playing games?
Now, this may surprise you, but it turns out there is actually some scientific research this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people who care of us at the end of our lives, recently issued a report on most frequently expressed regrets that people say when they are literally on their deathbeds. that’s what I want to share with you today — top five regrets of the dying.
Number one: I I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I wish had stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: wish I had let myself be happier. Number four: wish I’d had the courage to express my true self. And five: I wish I’d lived a life true to dreams, instead of what others expected of me.
Now, far as I know, no one ever told one of the workers, “I wish I’d spent more time playing video games,” but I hear these top five regrets of the dying, I can’t but hear five deep human cravings that games actually help fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. many people, this means, I wish I’d spent more with my family, with my kids when they were up. Well, we know that playing games together has tremendous family benefits. A recent study Brigham Young University School of Family Life reported that parents who spend time playing video games with their kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d in touch with my friends.” Hundreds of millions of people social games like FarmVille or Words With Friends to stay in contact with real-life friends and family. A recent study from the University of Michigan showed that games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. They help us stay connected with people in our social network we would otherwise grow distant from, if we weren’t games together.
“I wish I’d let myself be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but of the groundbreaking clinical trials recently conducted at East Carolina University that that online games can outperform pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety depression. Just 30 minutes of online game play a day was enough create dramatic boosts in mood and long-term increases in happiness.
“I I’d had the courage to express my true self.” Well, are a way to express our true selves, our most heroic, idealized version of who we become. You can see that in this alter ego portrait by Cooper of a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford University has doing research for five years now to document how playing a game with an idealized avatar changes we think and act in real life, making us more courageous, more ambitious, committed to our goals.
“I wish I’d led a life true my dreams, and not what others expected of me.” Are games this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left a Super question mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But in the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, who this game designer to be talking to us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve never worked a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I did spend three in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting to die.
Now let me tell you that story. It two years ago, when I hit my head and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t heal properly, and 30 days, I was left with symptoms like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My told me that in order to heal my brain, I had rest it. So I had to avoid everything that triggered my symptoms. For that meant no reading, no writing, no video games, work or email, no running, no alcohol, no caffeine. In words — and I think you see where this is — no reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant to be funny, but all seriousness, suicidal ideation is quite common with traumatic brain injuries. happens to one in three, and it happened to me. brain started telling me, “Jane, you want to die.” said, “You’re never going to get better.” It said, “The pain will never end.”
And these voices so persistent and so persuasive that I started to legitimately fear for my life, which is the time I said to myself after 34 days — and I never forget this moment — I said, “I am either going to kill myself or I’m going to this into a game.”
Now, why a game? I from researching the psychology of games for more than a decade that when we play a game — this is in the scientific literature — we tackle challenges with more creativity, more determination, more optimism, and we’re likely to reach out to others for help. I wanted to bring these traits to my real-life challenge, so I created a role-playing recovery called Jane the Concussion Slayer.
Now this became my new identity, and the first thing I did as a slayer call my twin sister — I have an identical sister named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a game to my brain, and I want you to play with me.” This was an easier way ask for help.
She became my first ally in the game, husband Kiyash joined next, and together we identified and the bad guys. Now this was anything that could my symptoms and therefore slow down the healing process, things like lights and crowded spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. was anything I could do on even my worst day to just a little bit good, just a little bit productive. Things like cuddling dog for 10 minutes, or getting out of bed walking around the block just once.
Now the game was that simple: Adopt a identity, recruit your allies, battle the bad guys, activate the power-ups. even with a game so simple, within just a couple of starting to play, that fog of depression and anxiety went away. It just vanished. It felt like miracle. Now it wasn’t a miracle cure for the or the cognitive symptoms. That lasted for more than year, and it was the hardest year of my life far. But even when I still had the symptoms, while I was still in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what happened with the game surprised me. I put up some posts and videos online, explaining how to play. But everybody has a concussion, obviously, not everyone wants to be “the slayer,” so I the game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing from people all the world who were adopting their own secret identity, recruiting their own allies, they were getting “super better,” facing challenges like cancer chronic pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. Even people were it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. And I could tell their messages and their videos that the game was helping in the same ways that it helped me. They about feeling stronger and braver. They talked about feeling understood by their friends and family. And they even talked about happier, even though they were in pain, even though they were tackling toughest challenge of their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, is going on here? I mean, how could a game trivial intervene so powerfully in such serious, and in some life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t worked for me, there’s no way would have believed it was possible. Well, it turns out there’s science here, too. Some people get stronger and happier after a event. And that’s what was happening to us.
The was helping us experience what scientists call post-traumatic growth, which is something we usually hear about. We usually hear about post-traumatic stress disorder. But now know that a traumatic event doesn’t doom us to suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use as a springboard to unleash our best qualities and happier lives.
Here are the top five things that people with post-traumatic say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m not afraid to what makes me happy.” “I feel closer to my and family.” “I understand myself better. I know who I really am now.” “I have a new of meaning and purpose in my life.” “I’m better able to on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does this sound familiar? should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic growth are essentially the direct of the top five regrets of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? seems that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability to lead a with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? How you get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, there a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic growth without the trauma, having to hit your head in the first place? That would good, right?
I wanted to understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured the literature, and here’s what I learned. There are four of strength, or resilience, that contribute to post-traumatic growth, and there are scientifically validated activities that can do every day to build up these four kinds of resilience, and you don’t need trauma to do it.
I could tell you what these four types of strength are, but I’d rather experience them firsthand. I’d rather we all start building them up together now. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll play quick game together. This is where you earn the and a half minutes of bonus life that I promised you earlier. All you have do is successfully complete the first four SuperBetter quests. And I feel you can do it. I have confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? is your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: up and take three steps, or make your hands into fists, raise over your head as high as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I the people doing both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 physical resilience, which that your body can withstand more stress and heal itself faster. We know from the research that number one thing you can do to boost your resilience is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every second that you are not sitting still, you are actively improving health of your heart, and your lungs and brains.
Everybody ready your next quest? I want you to snap your exactly 50 times, or count backwards from 100 by seven, this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t give up.
(Snapping)
Don’t the people counting down from 100 interfere with your counting 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the first time I’ve ever seen that. Bonus physical resilience. done, everyone. Now that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which means you have more mental focus, more discipline, determination willpower. We know from the scientific research that willpower actually works like a muscle. gets stronger the more you exercise it. So tackling tiny challenge without giving up, even one as absurd as snapping your exactly 50 times or counting backwards from 100 by seven actually a scientifically validated way to boost your willpower.
So good job. number three. Pick one: Because of the room, fate’s really this for you, but here are the two options. If you’re inside, find a and look out of it. If you’re outside, find window and look in. Or do a quick YouTube Google image search for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do on your phones, or just shout out some baby animals, and I’ll put on the screen. So, what do we want to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see we got. Baby dolphin and baby llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re clapping for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, we’re just feeling there is plus-one emotional resilience, which you have the ability to provoke powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, which feel looking at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s secret from the scientific literature for you. If you can manage to experience three positive for every one negative emotion over the course of an hour, a day, a week, you improve your health and your ability to successfully tackle any you’re facing. And this is called the three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, so keep up.
All right, pick one, last quest: Shake someone’s hand for seconds, or send someone a quick thank you by text, email, or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. Keep it up. I love it! All right, everybody, is +1 social resilience, which means you actually get strength from your friends, your neighbors, your family, your community. Now, a great way boost social resilience is gratitude. Touch is even better.
Here’s one more secret you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises level of oxytocin in your bloodstream, now that’s the trust hormone. That means that all of who just shook hands are biochemically primed to like and want help each other. This will linger during the break, so take advantage of the opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully completed your four quests, let’s if I’ve successfully completed my mission to give you seven and half minutes of bonus life. Now I get to share one little bit of science with you. It turns out that who regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, emotional social — live 10 years longer than everyone else. So this is true. If are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if you are never sitting still more than an hour at a time, if you are reaching out to one person you care about single day, if you are tackling tiny goals to your willpower, you will live 10 years longer than everyone else, here’s where that math I showed you earlier comes in.
So, the average life expectancy in U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, but we from more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you can add 10 of life by boosting your four types of resilience. every single year that you are boosting your four of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more years of life 46 more days of life, or 67,298 more minutes of life, which means every day, you are earning 184 minutes of life, or single hour that you are boosting your four types of resilience, like just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes of life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half are all yours. You totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You still have your special mission, your mission. How are you going to spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s my suggestion. These and a half bonus minutes are kind of like genie’s wishes. You can use your first wish to for a million more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend these seven and a minutes today doing something that makes you happy, or that you physically active, or puts you in touch with you care about, or even just tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going to boost your resilience, so you’re going earn more minutes.
And the good news is, you keep going like that. Every hour of the day, every day of your life, all the way your deathbed, which will now be 10 years later it would have otherwise. And when you get there, more likely, you will not have any of those top regrets, because you will have built up the strength and resilience to lead a truer to your dreams. And with 10 extra years, might even have enough time to play a few games.
Thank you.
(Applause)