I’m a gamer, so like to have goals. I like special missions and secret objectives. So here’s my special mission this talk: I’m going to try to increase the life span of every person in this room by seven and a half minutes. Literally, will live seven and a half minutes longer than you have otherwise, just because you watched this talk.
Some you are looking a little bit skeptical. That’s okay, because it out — I have math to prove that it possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain it all later, pay attention to the number at the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. That be my gift to you if I’m successful in my mission.
Now, you have a mission too. Your mission is to figure out how you want to spend your extra seven and a minutes. And I think you should do something unusual them, because these are bonus minutes. You weren’t going to them anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you be thinking to yourself, I know what she wants us to do with those minutes, wants us to spend them playing games. Now this a totally reasonable assumption, given that I have made quite a habit of encouraging people spend more time playing games. For example, in my first TED Talk, did propose that we should spend 21 billion hours week, as a planet, playing video games.
Now, 21 hours, it’s a lot of time. It’s so much time, fact, that the number one unsolicited comment that I have heard from all over the world since I gave that talk, is this: Jane, are great and all, but on your deathbed, are you really going to you spent more time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea so pervasive — that games are a waste of time that we will to regret — that I hear it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: Just a few ago, this cab driver, upon finding out that a friend and I were in town for a developers’ conference, turned around and said — and I quote — “I hate games. Waste of life. Imagine to the end of your life and regretting all that time.”
Now, I want to take problem seriously. I want games to be a force good in the world. I don’t want gamers to the time they spent playing, time that I encouraged to spend. So I have been thinking about this question lot lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, will we regret the we spent playing games?
Now, this may surprise you, but it turns out there is some scientific research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people take care of us at the end of our lives, issued a report on the most frequently expressed regrets that people when they are literally on their deathbeds. And that’s I want to share with you today — the five regrets of the dying.
Number one: I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I I had stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: wish I had let myself be happier. Number four: wish I’d had the courage to express my true self. number five: I wish I’d lived a life true to my dreams, instead of what others expected me.
Now, as far as I know, no one told one of the hospice workers, “I wish I’d spent more time playing video games,” but I hear these top five regrets of the dying, can’t help but hear five deep human cravings that games help us fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. many people, this means, I wish I’d spent more time with my family, with my kids they were growing up. Well, we know that playing games together has family benefits. A recent study from Brigham Young University School of Life reported that parents who spend more time playing video games with their have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d stayed in touch with my friends.” of millions of people use social games like FarmVille or With Friends to stay in daily contact with real-life friends and family. recent study from the University of Michigan showed that these games are powerful relationship-management tools. They help us stay connected with people our social network that we would otherwise grow distant from, we weren’t playing games together.
“I wish I’d let be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but think of the clinical trials recently conducted at East Carolina University that that online games can outperform pharmaceuticals for treating clinical and depression. Just 30 minutes of online game play a day was enough to create boosts in mood and long-term increases in happiness.
“I I’d had the courage to express my true self.” Well, avatars are way to express our true selves, our most heroic, idealized version of who we might become. You see that in this alter ego portrait by Robbie of a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford University has been doing for five years now to document how playing a game with idealized avatar changes how we think and act in real life, us more courageous, more ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I I’d led a life true to my dreams, and not others expected of me.” Are games doing this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left a Super Mario mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But the meantime, perhaps you’re wondering, who is this game designer be talking to us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve worked in a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I did three months in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting die.
Now let me tell you that story. It started two years ago, when I hit my head got a concussion. The concussion didn’t heal properly, and after 30 days, I was left with like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, memory loss, mental fog. My doctor told me in order to heal my brain, I had to it. So I had to avoid everything that triggered symptoms. For me that meant no reading, no writing, no games, no work or email, no running, no alcohol, caffeine. In other words — and I think you where this is going — no reason to live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant to funny, but in all seriousness, suicidal ideation is quite common with traumatic brain injuries. It happens one in three, and it happened to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, want to die.” It said, “You’re never going to better.” It said, “The pain will never end.”
And these voices so persistent and so persuasive that I started to fear for my life, which is the time that I said to myself after 34 days — I will never forget this moment — I said, “I am going to kill myself or I’m going to turn into a game.”
Now, why a game? I knew from researching psychology of games for more than a decade that when we play a game — this is in the scientific literature — we tackle tough challenges more creativity, more determination, more optimism, and we’re more likely to reach out others for help. I wanted to bring these gamer traits my real-life challenge, so I created a role-playing recovery game called the Concussion Slayer.
Now this became my new secret identity, the first thing I did as a slayer was call my twin sister — I an identical twin sister named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a game to heal my brain, I want you to play with me.” This was an easier to ask for help.
She became my first ally in game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together we identified battled the bad guys. Now this was anything that trigger my symptoms and therefore slow down the healing process, like bright lights and crowded spaces. We also collected and power-ups. This was anything I could do on even my worst day feel just a little bit good, just a little bit productive. Things like cuddling my dog 10 minutes, or getting out of bed and walking around block just once.
Now the game was that simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit allies, battle the bad guys, activate the power-ups. But even with a game so simple, within just couple days of starting to play, that fog of depression and went away. It just vanished. It felt like a miracle. Now it wasn’t miracle cure for the headaches or the cognitive symptoms. That lasted for than a year, and it was the hardest year of my life far. But even when I still had the symptoms, even while I was in pain, I stopped suffering.
Now what happened next with the surprised me. I put up some blog posts and videos online, explaining how to play. not everybody has a concussion, obviously, not everyone wants to be “the slayer,” so I the game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing from all over the world who were adopting their own secret identity, their own allies, and they were getting “super better,” challenges like cancer and chronic pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. Even were playing it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. And I could tell their messages and their videos that the game was helping them in the ways that it helped me. They talked about feeling stronger and braver. talked about feeling better understood by their friends and family. And they talked about feeling happier, even though they were in pain, even though they were tackling the toughest challenge their lives.
Now at the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is going here? I mean, how could a game so trivial intervene powerfully in such serious, and in some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if it hadn’t for me, there’s no way I would have believed was possible. Well, it turns out there’s some science here, too. people get stronger and happier after a traumatic event. that’s what was happening to us.
The game was helping us experience what call post-traumatic growth, which is not something we usually hear about. We usually hear post-traumatic stress disorder. But scientists now know that a event doesn’t doom us to suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as a springboard unleash our best qualities and lead happier lives.
Here the top five things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m afraid to do what makes me happy.” “I feel to my friends and family.” “I understand myself better. know who I really am now.” “I have a new sense of meaning and purpose my life.” “I’m better able to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does sound familiar? It should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic growth are the direct opposite of the top five regrets of the dying. Now this is interesting, right? It that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability lead a life with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? How do you get from trauma growth? Or better yet, is there a way to get all benefits of post-traumatic growth without the trauma, without having to hit your head in the first place? That be good, right?
I wanted to understand the phenomenon better, so I devoured the literature, and here’s what I learned. There are four of strength, or resilience, that contribute to post-traumatic growth, and there are validated activities that you can do every day to build these four kinds of resilience, and you don’t need a trauma to do it.
I could tell what these four types of strength are, but I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather all start building them up together right now. Here’s we’re going to do. We’ll play a quick game together. This where you earn the seven and a half minutes of life that I promised you earlier. All you have to do is successfully complete the first SuperBetter quests. And I feel like you can do it. I confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? This is your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand and take three steps, or make your hands into fists, raise them your head as high as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I the people doing both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 physical resilience, means that your body can withstand more stress and heal itself faster. We know from the research the number one thing you can do to boost your physical resilience to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every single second that you are not still, you are actively improving the health of your heart, and lungs and brains.
Everybody ready for your next quest? I want you to your fingers exactly 50 times, or count backwards from 100 by seven, like this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting down from 100 interfere your counting to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the time I’ve ever seen that. Bonus physical resilience. Well done, everyone. Now that’s worth +1 mental resilience, which you have more mental focus, more discipline, determination and willpower. know from the scientific research that willpower actually works like a muscle. It gets stronger the more you it. So tackling a tiny challenge without giving up, even as absurd as snapping your fingers exactly 50 times or backwards from 100 by seven is actually a scientifically way to boost your willpower.
So good job. Quest three. Pick one: Because of the room, fate’s really determined this for you, here are the two options. If you’re inside, find a window and out of it. If you’re outside, find a window look in. Or do a quick YouTube or Google search for “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do it on phones, or just shout out some baby animals, and I’ll put them on screen. So, what do we want to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see what we got. Baby dolphin and llamas. Everybody look. Got that? Okay, one more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re for that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re just feeling there plus-one emotional resilience, which means you have the ability to provoke powerful, positive emotions curiosity or love, which we feel looking at baby animals, you need them most.
Here’s a secret from the scientific for you. If you can manage to experience three emotions for every one negative emotion over the course an hour, a day, a week, you dramatically improve your health and your to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is the three-to-one positive emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, keep it up.
All right, pick one, last quest: someone’s hand for six seconds, or send someone a quick thank you text, email, Facebook or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. Keep up. I love it! All right, everybody, that is +1 resilience, which means you actually get more strength from friends, your neighbors, your family, your community. Now, a great way to boost social is gratitude. Touch is even better.
Here’s one more for you: Shaking someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises the level of oxytocin in your bloodstream, that’s the trust hormone. That means that all of you who just hands are biochemically primed to like and want to help each other. This will linger the break, so take advantage of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully your four quests, let’s see if I’ve successfully completed my mission give you seven and a half minutes of bonus life. Now I get share one more little bit of science with you. It turns out people who regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, and social — live 10 years longer than everyone else. So this true. If you are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive ratio, if you are never sitting still for more an hour at a time, if you are reaching out to one person you care about every day, if you are tackling tiny goals to boost your willpower, you live 10 years longer than everyone else, and here’s where that math showed you earlier comes in.
So, the average life in the U.S. and the U.K. is 78.1 years, we know from more than 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that can add 10 years of life by boosting your types of resilience. So every single year that you boosting your four types of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more of life or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 more minutes of life, means every single day, you are earning 184 minutes of life, every single hour that you are boosting your four types of resilience, we just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more of life.
Congratulations, those seven and a half minutes are all yours. totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You have your special mission, your secret mission. How are you going spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s my suggestion. These seven and a half bonus minutes are of like genie’s wishes. You can use your first wish to wish a million more wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend these and a half minutes today doing something that makes you happy, or that gets you physically active, puts you in touch with someone you care about, or even just tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going boost your resilience, so you’re going to earn more minutes.
And good news is, you can keep going like that. Every hour the day, every day of your life, all the way to your deathbed, which will be 10 years later than it would have otherwise. And you get there, more than likely, you will not any of those top five regrets, because you will built up the strength and resilience to lead a life truer to your dreams. with 10 extra years, you might even have enough time play a few more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)