I’m a gamer, so I like to have goals. like special missions and secret objectives. So here’s my special mission for this talk: I’m to try to increase the life span of every person in this room by seven and a half minutes. Literally, will live seven and a half minutes longer than you would have otherwise, because you watched this talk.
Some of you are looking a bit skeptical. That’s okay, because check it out — have math to prove that it is possible. It won’t make much sense now. I’ll explain all later, just pay attention to the number at the bottom: +7.68245837 minutes. will be my gift to you if I’m successful my mission.
Now, you have a secret mission too. Your mission is to figure out how want to spend your extra seven and a half minutes. And I think should do something unusual with them, because these are bonus minutes. You weren’t going to have anyway.
Now, because I’m a game designer, you might thinking to yourself, I know what she wants us to do with those minutes, she wants us spend them playing games. Now this is a totally reasonable assumption, given that I have made quite habit of encouraging people to spend more time playing games. For example, in my first Talk, I did propose that we should spend 21 hours a week, as a planet, playing video games.
Now, 21 billion hours, it’s a of time. It’s so much time, in fact, that the number one unsolicited comment that I have from people all over the world since I gave talk, is this: Jane, games are great and all, on your deathbed, are you really going to wish you spent time playing Angry Birds?
(Laughter)
This idea is so — that games are a waste of time that will come to regret — that I hear it literally everywhere I go. For example, true story: Just few weeks ago, this cab driver, upon finding out that a friend and I were in town a game developers’ conference, turned around and said — and quote — “I hate games. Waste of life. Imagine getting the end of your life and regretting all that time.”
Now, want to take this problem seriously. I want games to be force for good in the world. I don’t want to regret the time they spent playing, time that I encouraged to spend. So I have been thinking about this question a lately. When we’re on our deathbeds, will we regret time we spent playing games?
Now, this may surprise you, but it turns out there is actually some research on this question. It’s true. Hospice workers, the people who take of us at the end of our lives, recently issued a report on the most expressed regrets that people say when they are literally their deathbeds. And that’s what I want to share with today — the top five regrets of the dying.
Number one: wish I hadn’t worked so hard. Number two: I wish had stayed in touch with my friends. Number three: I wish had let myself be happier. Number four: I wish I’d had the courage to express my true self. number five: I wish I’d lived a life true to my dreams, of what others expected of me.
Now, as far I know, no one ever told one of the hospice workers, “I I’d spent more time playing video games,” but when I hear these top five regrets of the dying, can’t help but hear five deep human cravings that actually help us fulfill.
For example, I wish I hadn’t worked so hard. many people, this means, I wish I’d spent more with my family, with my kids when they were growing up. Well, know that playing games together has tremendous family benefits. recent study from Brigham Young University School of Family reported that parents who spend more time playing video with their kids have much stronger real-life relationships with them.
“I wish I’d stayed in touch with my friends.” Hundreds millions of people use social games like FarmVille or Words With Friends to stay in daily with real-life friends and family. A recent study from the University of Michigan showed that games are incredibly powerful relationship-management tools. They help us stay with people in our social network that we would otherwise distant from, if we weren’t playing games together.
“I wish I’d let be happier.” Well, here I can’t help but think the groundbreaking clinical trials recently conducted at East Carolina University that showed that online games can pharmaceuticals for treating clinical anxiety and depression. Just 30 minutes of online play a day was enough to create dramatic boosts in and long-term increases in happiness.
“I wish I’d had the courage to my true self.” Well, avatars are a way to express our true selves, our most heroic, idealized version who we might become. You can see that in this ego portrait by Robbie Cooper of a gamer with his avatar. And Stanford University has been research for five years now to document how playing a with an idealized avatar changes how we think and act in real life, making us courageous, more ambitious, more committed to our goals.
“I wish I’d led a life true to dreams, and not what others expected of me.” Are games this yet? I’m not sure, so I’ve left a Super Mario mark. We’re going to come back to this one.
But in the meantime, you’re wondering, who is this game designer to be to us about deathbed regrets? And it’s true, I’ve worked in a hospice, I’ve never been on my deathbed. But recently I did spend months in bed, wanting to die. Really wanting to die.
Now let me tell that story. It started two years ago, when I hit head and got a concussion. The concussion didn’t heal properly, after 30 days, I was left with symptoms like nonstop headaches, nausea, vertigo, loss, mental fog. My doctor told me that in order to heal brain, I had to rest it. So I had to avoid everything triggered my symptoms. For me that meant no reading, no writing, no video games, work or email, no running, no alcohol, no caffeine. In words — and I think you see where this is going — no reason live.
(Laughter)
Of course it’s meant to be funny, but in all seriousness, suicidal is quite common with traumatic brain injuries. It happens to one three, and it happened to me. My brain started telling me, “Jane, you want to die.” said, “You’re never going to get better.” It said, “The pain will never end.”
And these voices so persistent and so persuasive that I started to fear for my life, which is the time that I said to myself after 34 days — I will never forget this moment — I said, “I am either going kill myself or I’m going to turn this into game.”
Now, why a game? I knew from researching the of games for more than a decade that when play a game — and this is in the scientific — we tackle tough challenges with more creativity, more determination, optimism, and we’re more likely to reach out to others for help. I wanted to bring these traits to my real-life challenge, so I created a role-playing recovery game called Jane the Slayer.
Now this became my new secret identity, and the first thing I did as a was call my twin sister — I have an identical twin named Kelly — and tell her, “I’m playing a game to heal my brain, and want you to play with me.” This was an easier way ask for help.
She became my first ally in game, my husband Kiyash joined next, and together we identified and battled the guys. Now this was anything that could trigger my symptoms and slow down the healing process, things like bright lights and spaces. We also collected and activated power-ups. This was I could do on even my worst day to feel just a little bit good, just a bit productive. Things like cuddling my dog for 10 minutes, or out of bed and walking around the block just once.
Now the game was simple: Adopt a secret identity, recruit your allies, battle the bad guys, activate the power-ups. even with a game so simple, within just a couple days of starting play, that fog of depression and anxiety went away. just vanished. It felt like a miracle. Now it wasn’t miracle cure for the headaches or the cognitive symptoms. That lasted for more than a year, it was the hardest year of my life by far. But when I still had the symptoms, even while I was still in pain, I suffering.
Now what happened next with the game surprised me. I put some blog posts and videos online, explaining how to play. But not everybody has a concussion, obviously, everyone wants to be “the slayer,” so I renamed game SuperBetter.
And soon, I started hearing from people all the world who were adopting their own secret identity, their own allies, and they were getting “super better,” facing like cancer and chronic pain, depression and Crohn’s disease. people were playing it for terminal diagnoses like ALS. And I could tell from messages and their videos that the game was helping them in the same ways that it helped me. talked about feeling stronger and braver. They talked about feeling understood by their friends and family. And they even talked about happier, even though they were in pain, even though were tackling the toughest challenge of their lives.
Now the time, I’m thinking to myself, what is going here? I mean, how could a game so trivial intervene so powerfully such serious, and in some cases life-and-death, circumstances? I mean, if hadn’t worked for me, there’s no way I would believed it was possible. Well, it turns out there’s some science here, too. Some people stronger and happier after a traumatic event. And that’s what was happening to us.
The was helping us experience what scientists call post-traumatic growth, which not something we usually hear about. We usually hear about post-traumatic disorder. But scientists now know that a traumatic event doesn’t us to suffer indefinitely. Instead, we can use it as a springboard unleash our best qualities and lead happier lives.
Here are the top things that people with post-traumatic growth say: “My priorities have changed.” “I’m not to do what makes me happy.” “I feel closer to my friends and family.” “I understand myself better. know who I really am now.” “I have a new sense of meaning purpose in my life.” “I’m better able to focus on my goals and dreams.”
Now, does sound familiar? It should, because the top five traits of post-traumatic growth essentially the direct opposite of the top five regrets of the dying. Now is interesting, right? It seems that somehow, a traumatic event can unlock our ability to a life with fewer regrets.
But how does it work? do you get from trauma to growth? Or better yet, there a way to get all the benefits of post-traumatic growth without the trauma, without having to your head in the first place? That would be good, right?
I wanted to the phenomenon better, so I devoured the scientific literature, here’s what I learned. There are four kinds of strength, resilience, that contribute to post-traumatic growth, and there are validated activities that you can do every day to build up these four kinds of resilience, and don’t need a trauma to do it.
I could tell you what these four types strength are, but I’d rather you experience them firsthand. I’d rather all start building them up together right now. Here’s what we’re going to do. We’ll play quick game together. This is where you earn the seven a half minutes of bonus life that I promised you earlier. All you have to do is successfully the first four SuperBetter quests. And I feel like you can do it. I confidence in you.
So, everybody ready? This is your first quest. Here we go. Pick one: Stand and take three steps, or make your hands into fists, raise them over your as high as you can for five seconds, go! All right, I like people doing both. You are overachievers. Very good.
(Laughter)
Well done, everyone. That is worth +1 physical resilience, means that your body can withstand more stress and heal itself faster. We know from the research that number one thing you can do to boost your physical is to not sit still. That’s all it takes. Every single second that you are sitting still, you are actively improving the health of heart, and your lungs and brains.
Everybody ready for your next quest? I you to snap your fingers exactly 50 times, or backwards from 100 by seven, like this: 100, 93… Go!
(Snapping)
Don’t give up.
(Snapping)
Don’t let the people counting down 100 interfere with your counting to 50.
(Snapping)
(Laughter)
Nice. Wow. That’s the first time I’ve ever that. Bonus physical resilience. Well done, everyone. Now that’s +1 mental resilience, which means you have more mental focus, more discipline, determination and willpower. We from the scientific research that willpower actually works like muscle. It gets stronger the more you exercise it. tackling a tiny challenge without giving up, even one as as snapping your fingers exactly 50 times or counting backwards from 100 by seven is a scientifically validated way to boost your willpower.
So good job. Quest number three. Pick one: of the room, fate’s really determined this for you, but here are two options. If you’re inside, find a window and look out of it. you’re outside, find a window and look in. Or do a quick YouTube or Google image search “baby [your favorite animal.]”
Do it on your phones, or just out some baby animals, and I’ll put them on the screen. So, what do we to see? Sloth, giraffe, elephant, snake. Okay, let’s see what we got. Baby dolphin and baby llamas. look. Got that? Okay, one more. Baby elephant.
(Audience) Oh!
We’re clapping that? That’s amazing.
(Laughter)
All right, what we’re just feeling is plus-one emotional resilience, which means you have the ability provoke powerful, positive emotions like curiosity or love, which we feel at baby animals, when you need them most.
Here’s a secret from the scientific literature for you. you can manage to experience three positive emotions for one negative emotion over the course of an hour, a day, a week, you dramatically improve your and your ability to successfully tackle any problem you’re facing. And this is called the three-to-one emotion ratio. It’s my favorite SuperBetter trick, so keep up.
All right, pick one, last quest: Shake someone’s hand for six seconds, or send someone quick thank you by text, email, Facebook or Twitter. Go!
(Chatting)
Looking good, looking good. Nice, nice. it up. I love it! All right, everybody, that +1 social resilience, which means you actually get more strength from friends, your neighbors, your family, your community. Now, a great way to social resilience is gratitude. Touch is even better.
Here’s one more secret for you: someone’s hand for six seconds dramatically raises the level of oxytocin in your bloodstream, now that’s the hormone. That means that all of you who just shook hands are biochemically primed like and want to help each other. This will linger during the break, so advantage of the networking opportunities.
(Laughter)
Well, you have successfully completed your four quests, let’s if I’ve successfully completed my mission to give you and a half minutes of bonus life. Now I get to share one more bit of science with you. It turns out that people regularly boost these four types of resilience — physical, mental, and social — live 10 years longer than everyone else. So this true. If you are regularly achieving the three-to-one positive emotion ratio, if you are never sitting still more than an hour at a time, if you reaching out to one person you care about every day, if you are tackling tiny goals to boost your willpower, you will live 10 longer than everyone else, and here’s where that math I you earlier comes in.
So, the average life expectancy in the U.S. and U.K. is 78.1 years, but we know from more 1,000 peer-reviewed scientific studies that you can add 10 years of life boosting your four types of resilience. So every single year that you are your four types of resilience, you’re actually earning .128 more of life or 46 more days of life, or 67,298 minutes of life, which means every single day, you earning 184 minutes of life, or every single hour you are boosting your four types of resilience, like just did together, you are earning 7.68245837 more minutes of life.
Congratulations, those seven and half minutes are all yours. You totally earned them.
Yeah!
(Applause)
Awesome. Wait, wait, wait. You still have your mission, your secret mission. How are you going to spend these minutes of bonus life?
Well, here’s suggestion. These seven and a half bonus minutes are kind like genie’s wishes. You can use your first wish to wish for a million wishes. Pretty clever, right? So, if you spend these seven and a half minutes doing something that makes you happy, or that gets you active, or puts you in touch with someone you care about, even just tackling a tiny challenge, you’re going to your resilience, so you’re going to earn more minutes.
And the good news is, you can going like that. Every hour of the day, every day of your life, all the way your deathbed, which will now be 10 years later it would have otherwise. And when you get there, than likely, you will not have any of those top five regrets, because you have built up the strength and resilience to lead a truer to your dreams. And with 10 extra years, you might even have time to play a few more games.
Thank you.
(Applause)