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You are here: Home / Quynhhx / How to disagree with respect — not hate

How to disagree with respect — not hate

9 Tháng 8, 2024 by admin

In 1967, Ronald Reagan became the governor of the of California. In his inaugural address, he talked about peaceful transfer of power, something he described as “the magic of the commonplace routine, which makes it a near miracle to many of the world’s inhabitants.” He then went on to utter an iconic phrase would be repeated by politicians for decades to come. “Freedom is a fragile thing,” he said, “And it’s never more than one generation away from extinction.”

Now countless others, I have used that quote many times, I have a confession to make. I never really believed it. Surely, after 250 years of this stuff, we no longer have to worry about losing it. I’m not pleased to that I actually believe it now.

The first cracks in my confidence came during one of those commonplace routines of transferring power as Lieutenant Governor the State of Utah. It was my duty to certify the of the electors for the presidential election. While the meeting do so was open to the public, it was so and routine that no one ever showed up. As I walked into the room, was stunned to see dozens of angry protesters screaming that the election had been stolen and demanding that violate state law and change the votes of the electors.

Now know what you’re all thinking, and you’re probably wrong. This was 2020. This was 2016, and the protesters were Hillary Clinton supporters.

Now it got far somehow, four years later. With the election less than months away, a friend and I were talking and lamenting about the state of our our country following a summer of destructive by the extreme left and an extreme right that was already undermining the validity of an election that hadn’t even yet. “Isn’t there something you can do,” she asked.

Well, that haunted me all weekend, so I picked up the phone called my opponent. By the way, I was running for governor at the same time that and Biden were battling for the presidency. I called my opponent, a Democrat named Peterson, whom I respected, and I said, “Hey, Chris, this is Spencer Cox. I have a crazy idea. What if we a campaign ad together?”

I could almost hear the confused look forming on his face. To credit, he agreed, and one week later, we were in a studio together. Let’s watch.

(Video) I’m Chris Peterson. And I’m Spencer Cox.

CP: We are currently in the final days of campaigning against each other be your next governor.

SC: And while I think you vote for me —

CP: Yeah, but really, you should vote me.

SC: There are some things we both agree on.

CP: can debate issues without degrading each other’s character.

SC: We can disagree without hating each other.

CP: And or lose, in Utah, we work together.

SC: So let’s show the country that there’s a way.

CP: My name is Chris Peterson.

SC: And I’m Spencer Cox.

(Together) And we this message.

(Applause)

Well, the response was instantaneous and overwhelming. The ad went viral. Neither us saw it coming. There were media requests from all over the world, millions of views and shares. Perhaps there really is exhausted majority, I remember thinking to myself, and maybe this is the message they to hear.

I could actually feel my faith in the American start to rekindle. The popularity of the ad validated my hope that most people really do want their leaders to uphold the values that we teach our kids. That we can disagree without and contempt, even that we can find ways to treat each with respect even when we disagree. It seemed like was a hunger for architects instead of arsonists.

My hunch was confirmed one later, when a professor submitted a version of our ad to the Stanford Polarization and Social Change Lab part of a huge depolarization experiment. It was chosen as one 25 interventions to be tested on over 30,000 people. The result? Our ad actually had a measurable depolarization effect, including a reduction in urges violence. It turns out there really are things that we can do to alter the trajectory of the States.

Now look, I get it. It’s easy to feel a little hopeless as Americans once again barrel towards an election with unsatisfying and campaigns. But there is good news. Over the past months, 20 governors from all across the country have filmed similar ads, most of them with a servant from the opposing party. And the data continues show that people really are hungry for something different. According to polling from More in Common, 70 of Americans hate the divisiveness in politics. And it also turns out that … Americans aren’t as far apart as think we are. The problem isn’t how far apart the average and the average Democrat is on the actual issues. fact, we’re not much different than other Western democracies. The problem is how far apart we think we are. in large part to conflict entrepreneurs in both the media and politics, both sides overestimate the extremism on the side by about 30 percent. Now interestingly, this perception is actually strongest amongst progressive activists on the left and amongst extreme on the right. So the people most engaged in the political process also have the most inaccurate views of the other side.

But perhaps the news of all is that there are very practical things that every one of us can do day to help heal the divides in our nations and our neighborhoods. First, we can start by turning off and tuning out of those conflict entrepreneurs. My wife and I, we watching cable news 11 years ago and immediately saw an improvement in our marriage, our family, and mental health.

(Laughter and applause)

Now that always elicits a laugh, but we’re not alone. Studies have found that time spent on the latest headlines, whether through social media or traditional media outlets, is bad for our mental health. Psychologists refer to this phenomenon in ways, like media saturation overload or doomscrolling or headline anxiety. see, more news, on all the time, isn’t making us smarter, it’s just stressing us out.

Second, we can spend time, preferably offline, with real people who are different than us. In the of Bryan Stevenson, proximity will empower you. You see, it’s just harder to hate up close. “Tell me more why you feel that way” is a magical request.

Twenty ago, we rarely identified each other by our political identities first. As for me, I’m a father. I’m an NBA fan. I’m a terrible aspiring bassist in a band. I’m a Utahn. I’m an American. about you? You see, if we look beyond our political tribes, we can actually find shared identities friendships that unite instead of divide.

Now third, we can others. Service and volunteering help build up communities and improve our outlook on life and the people us. Some forms of regular volunteering have even been associated with lower blood pressure. There is nothing better for the soul or society than back. Aristotle really was on to something when he described and summed up the essence of life as: “Serve others do good.”

Fourth, and finally, we can work to develop classical political virtues of humility, patience and moderation, without which, as John Adams explained, we become ravenous beasts of prey. Now look, I know it’s almost laughable to talk words like humility in political discourse, but I truly believe that is the only way for us to remember how to without hate and contempt. In the words of Judge Learned Hand, who so eloquently stated, “The true spirit of is the spirit which is not too sure it is right. The spirit of liberty is the spirit seeks to understand the minds of other men and women.”

And I started a quote from Ronald Reagan. He went on to say that freedom not ours by way of inheritance. It must be fought for and defended constantly by each generation, for comes only once to a people and those in history who have known freedom then lost it have never known it again. Ladies and gentlemen, it is our solemn in our generation to once again secure the freedoms endowed to all of us from on high. We cannot wait for politicians or the media to do it. It will take real work, hard work by each of us. But we must remember to disagree without hate.

We must rise up and meet that radical call to love our enemies — even, especially, our political opponents. It’s … It’s not an … It’s not an easy answer, but it is a simple one. If we really want to change the world, we have to start changing our own hearts.

Thank you.

(Applause)

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